I made this little book as part of my September kit from Cupcake Scrapshop. It has little envelopes which I intended to fill with quotes about faith. I have not filled my book yet, but I think I will do it this evening when I get home.
I am truly a believer in my path being directed. What has been a challenge for me is following this path and not really knowing where it may lead. Have you ever wanted to do something that is so risky it scares the shit out of you? You feel it is right and you want to do it, but you don’t.
As I have gotten older, I find I am not as patient as I used to be. I could not figure out why for the longest time. Now, I think I know. Part of getting older is becoming more aware. I am acutely aware of how fast my children are growing and how fast the year seems to fly by. I am aware that I am still not living my bliss. That hurts my heart to even admit it. But, dealing with my truths is also an important part of getting older.
I have this longing for things to be like they used to be, but what in the hell does that mean. Honestly, it is returning to center. Returning to things that I did not worry about and stress over even when other parts of my life were in utter chaos. Things like:
- Crochet (I notice I pick it up again in high stress situations). You have to focus on the stitches when you crochet, so there is no time for crap.
- Reading is the perfect way to escape into another time, someone else’s life or just to laugh. Books are very comforting.
- Journals are perfect for getting it all out. No judgement. A paper sanctuary.
- Long Godly conversations. Seriously, I think the Lord must get tired of hearing from me. I think I even talk to him in my sleep. Always asking for guidance and courage.
- Baking. I find great comfort in baking and sharing what I made. Just because.
- Window shopping. I like thinking about the possibilities. Dreaming big.
I realize this inner turmoil will pass. I also realize this is a step in the right direction. Fear gives you the opportunity to do two things: run from it or kick its ass! I think an ass kicking is in order…
Stumble it!
Stumble It!
7 Comments
I can TOTALLY relate to you woman! I don’t have kids but I STRUGGLE with that want/need to do something but NOT doing it EVERY DAY! I am 33 and feel like I have just WASTED my life and I HATE that feeling. YET, I am afraid to do something about it. I don’t know why but I am. So I can relate. Kind of the pot calling the kettle black so to speak, meaning I’m in no position to be telling you what to do, but just take solace in those things that bring you calm & center your soul. OK, enough from me! LOL
Well, almost, I HAVE to tell you how much I ABSOLUTELY LOVE that album! It is one of my FAVORITE things I have seen recently! I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT IT! You did an AMAZING job on it!
Take Care~
AMEN!!! I feel you! The closer I get to 30…..lol I have just changed the way I look at things!
Totally understand what you’re feeling - and I say seize the day! Try pushing 50 with those feelings - follow your dreams and don’t let set backs get you down. It will all fall into place!
[and your album looks fabulous!]
word.
You speak from the bottom of my heart! That’s exactly what I’ve been dealing with these days. Thank you so much for posting this!
I also love to bake and give away my baking. Just because.
Thanks for sharing this
I feel the same way at the moment.
God bless you,
~Valaine